December 05, 2007
In a speech filled with patriotic rhetoric that ranged from slinging insults to insinuating that an invasion of Canada might be a good idea, the often controversial and only Jupiter Effected Meta to hold public office, Ernie Schwarzenegger, "The Governator" has perhaps created his most outrageous masterpiece to date. The Governator has banned the One World Government Organization from the state of California, a move which has first amendment advocates in an uproar. Though the Governator was asked pointed questions by the crowd, most notably by heroic Meta Dr. Samson Strong about the legality of his ban on OWGO, The Governor insinuated that the One World Government Organization is a threat to the United States and that they may be more sinister in nature than a mere political movement embraced by Europe and many other nations world-wide.
The speech which have caused many Republicans to distance themselves from the Governor of California, was met with an interesting take by President Lynch. "I've always supported Ernie, because he's a hero who has fought villainy at every turn. But Ernie is not a diplomat. Of course we're not going to invade Canada, or any other nation for their interest in or support of the One World Government concept. America enjoys its sovereignty, which wasn't really threatened by the vote taken by the United Nations. Our government can only be disrupted by Americans themselves, and we don't expect the other nations of the world to attempt to force us to join a world-wide coalition if we don't intend to. Ernie is going to be Ernie, and we shouldn't really get too excited about that or react too strongly to it. As for his state-wide ban on the OWGO organization, there have been precedents set in the past for the elimination of threats to the public interest. However, Ernie is going to have to come up with some proof that OWGO is more than a political system devised by some people who feel that the world should be one unified place before we rip up the constitutional amendments that are part of the reason America is so great. I'd caution my friend, Ernie, to not associate myself specifically or the White House, House of Representatives, or the Congress in his flag waving exuberance. We all love America, Ernie, that's why we said no at the One World Organization vote. But at this delicate time, we really do need to be patient with nations that have, for years, been our staunch allies, and seek to repair any harsh feelings with diplomacy."
The general feeling in the state of California by the citizenry has been mixed with a majority of citizens wondering about the sanity of their Governor. Felix Gordzano, the mayor of Oakland, for example, had this to say regarding the Governator's speech. "Well, it's unfortunate, that's really what it is. We all know that as far as localized issues like clean air, gun control, and stability of the world's fifth largest economy, Governor Schwarzenegger has been a fantastic governor. But when you make inflammatory comments like he just did, inciting violent ideas and insulting members of our government as well as other nations, well, let's just say I'm glad the Governor doesn't have his hand on the button, if you know what I mean."
Well known Freedom of Speech Activist Lonnie Parker has publicly denounced the Governator's speech, and says she plans to organize a rally in physical protest. "We can't have a so called leader like that running one of the most important states in the nation. Let's face it, the Governator got voted in because everybody thought it would be novel to have a super hero running a state. Well, we've found out the hard way, super heroes are best just fighting guys like that maniac Death Heckler. The Governator needs to retire as a political leader right now and go back to what he's good at. And I'm going to organize a peaceful rally so that he knows that we aren't going to stand for this kind of garbage!"
The Governator was unavailable for comment when we tried to reach him regarding his speech.
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